Today I shall mostly be talking about…History – and probably getting it wrong, but who cares.

Before I start I’m going to make it clear that before my blog gets too highbrow (two posts in a row not about being drunk? what are the odds) I will be utilising the words bum, poo and willy as often as possible during the following, rather more serious discussion. I will also probably get lots of facts wrong..but this is the internet…so you should expect that already. Research is for wimps with tiny willys without conviction in the nonsense they believe in.

So, anyway, lets get to it.

So I was doing a poo this morning (true) and reading a World History book (The No-nonsense guide to world history by Chris Brazier…I think it came free with a housemate’s copy of the New Internationalist) and came across a little box out thing about slavery. The point it raised (very briefly..the book is very short but surprisingly good for such a brief summary of so much history) was that the abolition of slavery came about for more reasons that just the humanitarian ones that instantly spring to mind (Wilberforce et al in England…all those lovely people in America (no research for me)). Its quite easy to look back and assume we stopped it because we realised how intensely wrong and evil it all is. So damn evil. Every story I’ve ever heard about slavery has made me sick to my very stomach. Saying that the practice is poo would be grossly (and I mean grossly) understating the situation.

But that’s not the point.

What I wanted to mention was the reason behind it mentioned in this book I mentioned. It said something that had never occurred to me. I felt like a willy-head for not having thought of it. it said the following:

…governments outlawed the practice chiefly for pragmatic reasons. Slaves might not have been well cared for but they had to be given accommodation and food as well as be kept under guard. The coming of factories with the industrial revolution made this trouble unnecessary: it was easier to exploit people’s labo[u]r in return for cash payments and leave them ‘free’ to find the necessities of life themselves. This was also why Britain led the way – because it was the first nation in the world to industrialise.

That’s from page 83 by the way..for those who believe in accurate referencing.

Anyway, as i wiped my bum (true) I started thinking about what a fool I’d been. These things always have motivation beyond the obvious moral one. Like war in Iraq. Was it for oil or was it for humanitarian reasons? I wonder. Anyway..it really made me think. It makes so much sense. Why pay for the shipping over of people when you can exploit people from your own backyard? I mean..I’m sure there were people around at the time who really cared about thinks…but governments aren’t generally in the business of caring. Well…not about people anyway. I mean…I’m sure that that is what they should be doing but it doesn’t tend to work that way.

Vive la revolution eh?

Anyway, it struck me as an interesting point, and it reminded me of something else I heard in a lecture a few years back that I never wrote down the source of. This is the almost entirely unresearched part (I looked at Henry Ford on wiki..and it mentioned it briefly…but generally made him seem like a much nicer guy than I’m about to…sorry Henners..I may be misrepresenting you…but I want to finish my point).

Anyway, basically, it reminded me of the statement that was made about Ford’s establishment of a 8-9 hour a day, five day a week form of employment, and a more than doubling of the minimum wage paid to 5 bucks a day. Now this all sounds great…the establishment of the modern working day, and better wages for poor workers. Brilliant. Minimum wages are great (I thoroughly enjoy mine…still not enough though…I keep on running out of paper to wipe my bum with…still…I always seem to find the money to get me drunk enough that I act like a willy and feel like poo the next day).

Anyway, the shock revelation here (one that Ford regularly pointed out to people who detracted from his rather liberal sounding ideas…it wasn’t really a shock..just something I hadn’t considered before) was that reducing the hours and increasing the wages, meant that people had enough time and money to buy and need more cars. And not just cars…but more of everything. As soon as you have that much free time and money…you have to spend it to fill up your time. The whole leisure industry is based upon this. It may be inaccurate…but I’d probably think of that as the birth of consumer culture. More money can be made out of people who have more money and time on their hands.

Its pretty damn interesting if you ask me.

Anyway, this was all probably obvious to most..but I thought I’d mention it just in case.

Any thoughts?

Bum poo willy