life

Declaring Dependence

Posted on 12 November 2009. Filed under: Mild Mania, Personal, Self Indulgent, Self Loathing, Self Obsession, Thoughts, life |

So, I’ve recently been feeling a little out of myself. Or rather, quite in myself, but unable to reach out of myself. Trouble communicating. Even though I’ve been writing a shed load for nano (still barely ahead of schedule, but I don’t feel like I can write tonight…we’ll see).
Anyway, there’s a secondary problem exacerbating this. [...]

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Poignant – G and the Velvet Underground

Posted on 7 August 2009. Filed under: Gonzo, Reality, Writing, life |

My friend G has decided to say goodbye to Brighton by staring intently into my wall.
A cheery surprise at my door, it quickly emerges that he has drunk a few pints, won some games of pool and taken about half a gram of horse tranquilliser. As we discuss, and go through, the process of coffee [...]

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My Problem – One of…

Posted on 1 June 2009. Filed under: Mild Mania, Personal, Thoughts, life |

I know I promised to start all posts with a picture now. But I’m having a problem with my tiredness and my ‘pooter, so I promise to make up for it with next post with a pretty picture of me.
——-
There is a saying that great genius matures late. If something is not brought to [...]

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Things they are a stirring

Posted on 24 May 2009. Filed under: Creativity, Music, Ramble, Thoughts, life |

Arthur Russel – This is how we walk on the moon
Basically, I feel a little guilty about not posting since forever, so I’m making up for it with a super short post full of delightful videos. It’s something at least.
We start off with the song that’s been in my soul lately. [...]

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Themes and Variations – My Mind, My Image and My Space

Posted on 24 April 2009. Filed under: Me, Ramble, life |

The view from my head in my bed where I think
Today’s post is gonna be weird. I couldn’t decide what I was going to write. Then I decided to continue a thought process that’s been being explored in an e-mail conversation with the Sea Witch. That conversation was all about (partly) how much I over-analyse [...]

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Thou Shalt Not Kill – Controversial Accountability?

Posted on 24 March 2009. Filed under: Politics, Religion, life |

Image reproduced under a Creative Commons License – Blood Nose by Steve Kay
I love that this image was my first hit for a CC Blood related image, as it happens to coincidentally include iconography relevant to today’s topic of interest. Score.
Anyway, this is essentially preparation/venting for an argument I’ve been gearing up to have with [...]

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Our Dancing Skeletons

Posted on 2 February 2009. Filed under: Music, Thoughts, life |

Blubbedy blub.
So, yesterday there was a charity thing that I DJed at in the Hobgoblin. The whole thing was in memory of the friend of mine who died November last year, raising money for the school on the island of Vanuatu that she was planning on volunteering on. Money was raised and fun was had. [...]

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Gut Wrench

Posted on 7 May 2008. Filed under: Mild Mania, Miserable, Ramble, Thoughts, life |

There is a hole in the pit of my gut. A huge writhing knot of dark matter twisting and turning and hurting.
I actually couldn’t make it in to work today because of a full on stomach cramp.
I’ve been feeling emotions much more physically lately, which has been great when I’ve been happy and bouncy and [...]

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Fear and Loathing on a Happy Monday

Posted on 24 March 2008. Filed under: Education, Environment, Fear, Learning, Loathing, Politics, Ramble, Rant, life |

Stuck in work. This is the second to last shift at the internet place. The place is rammed, due to the Bank’s going on holiday. The only appreciable difference to me is more high pitched squealing all around, and a promise of ‘a bit more money’, on pay day. This is good as I’ve already [...]

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A Theoretical Upper Limit to the Density of Experience

Posted on 18 March 2008. Filed under: Diary?, Music, Personal, Politics, life |

I bear the emotional, physical and mental scars of a densely packed weekend.
It feels like I squeezed the usual events of a month into about three-four days, to the point where I’m no longer sure how much time has actually elapsed, or is even occurring in the immediate present. My Shatner’s Bassoon is totally [...]

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Fey Lure and the Top of the Hill

Posted on 1 February 2008. Filed under: Dream, Failure, Mind, Walk, World, Writing, life |

Did the faerie folk lead me to the crest of a mountain?
Alas no, just more sound play.
I tried to write the project that’s been compostingĀ  since the year began, and I heard about this.
It didn’t work, and I’m frustrated by this. It may just be part of my current trouble with words and communication, or [...]

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Sleazed to Meat you

Posted on 25 January 2008. Filed under: Change, Feminism, Masculinity, Me, Mind, Sexual Violence, Useless, gender, life |

Disgusting people in this world.
Still feel smypathy for them, it’s hard not to. People end up having grown up with a warped and stunted view of socialisation. I’m not sure how it happens (though I have my suspicions) but some people seem unable to communicate wholly and fully, naturally and openly with other people.
Their goals, [...]

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Ass Per Asian Eel – Definitely a Monkey

Posted on 16 January 2008. Filed under: Aspirations, Career, Future, Lost, Personal, life |

My mind is flighty this evening. Running too fast and too tired. All in the mind.
But I’ve been thinking, andĀ  an article about people following dreams and potentially changing the way creativity is composted, coupled with a meeting at work about my ‘personal development’, is leading me to thoughts about where I’m going in life.
And [...]

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Dancing with the Sea and the Starlings

Posted on 11 January 2008. Filed under: Dancing, Elements, Living, Mind, Personal, Sea, life |

I feel alive today, like, really alive.
It was a long day at work, but in the middle of it I had to go to the other side of town (Hove, actually) for a brief training course.
The fire safety training was not exhilarating, but the walk there and back was.
I love walking, and I haven’t had [...]

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The Changing of the Calendar

Posted on 31 December 2007. Filed under: Insiration, Looking Back, Looking forward, Love, New Year, Resolutions, life |

So, the official new year is fast approaching (an hour and twenty minutes for those few people who live on the right (or wrong) side of the international date line) and I’m overwhelmed with underwhelmedness.
See, I’ve already thought of this year as the new year since post solstice. And aside for drunken antics, I feel [...]

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